Harper Seven Beckham Makes Twitter Debut

As I said before, welcome to the Matrix, Harper Seven.  Now you can join Cruz, Cheetoe, Staten Island, and the rest of your siblings in their juice pods where they are made into energy by the robots that feed off of them and control the planet Earth.  Wait, you haven't met Morpheus yet?  Well, then, none of this will make sense to you.  You'll understand in time.  (via Twitter and Facebook)

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Victoria Beckham and Husband David Beckham Welcome Harper Seven Into The Matrix

...and by "the Matrix" I mean planet Earth in the year 2011.  Frankly, Harper Seven is a fairly awesome name compared to Brooklyn, Tampon, Cheetoe, or whatever the hell their other kids are called.  And since the baby has been born, Victoria's weight has already dropped back to its baseline 85 pounds.  Wet.  Welcome to the Matrix, Harper Seven!  Hopefully Morpheus will come around and disconnect you so the robots don't feed on your juices when you're all grown up!

"Hmmm... Harper Seven or Seventeen Potter Barack?  I just can't decide!"

David Beckham Talks About His Tattoos On Craig Ferguson... Again

David Beckham is actually a pretty well-spoken guy, but whenever he goes on these shows, they always ask him about his tattoos.  This time, Craig Ferguson asks Beckham if he would ever consider getting a tattoo on his "junk".  Pretty interesting discussion, even though Craig Ferguson still isn't funny.  But he can work on that... like Jimmy Fallon.

David Beckham Cleaned Up Nicely For the Royal Wedding

Way to pull out the win, Beckham.  Not a tattoo in sight.  Wouldn't want to give the Queen a fright.  I think I just rhymed.  Sweet!

I wish he would have put the top hat on.